"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." - Socrates
Socrates, a classical Greek philosopher, was credited as being one of the founders of Western philosophy. He is also recognized as the first moral philosopher of the Western ethical tradition of thought.
That means Socrates was roaming the streets sharing inspirational thought-work over 2400 years ago. The image of Socrates standing on a box in the middle of the square, sharing his thought-work while a young scribe captures his words, never fails to make me smile. I can imagine the casual observers scratching their heads and wondering how anyone could be focused on the future, when they were just trying to make it through the day.
Are you choosing to be a casual observer of your own life by using all of your energy to focus on the past, or are you committed to taking that energy and putting it towards creating the new you? In what area of your life are you focusing your energy on fighting the old, rather than spending time imagining the new?
I’m reminded of a time in my life when Socrates’ words of wisdom would have been of great benefit to me.
My first marriage lasted twenty-five years. Sadly, the marriage itself had ended many years before that, but I fought like a warrior- doing anything I could to figure out how to make it work. I desperately wanted to cling to the old. I used every drop of energy I had trying to hold on to something that was no longer meant to be.
One evening I was in a bubble bath and I started to think about the TV commercial from Calgon Bath Salts- specifically the slogan: “Calgon Take Me Away.” I didn’t want to be literally taken away from life—But I did want to be taken away from the life that I was no longer living and was hardly even existing in.
No one was hurting me, my thoughts about my life were the only things that prevented me from moving from the old to the new. At that “Calgon moment” I made the decision to face the 50% of my life that wasn’t pretty, then look at the 50% that was pretty darn good. No more wallowing in what wasn’t- it was time to move toward what can be. I was ready to re-frame the talk in my head and face life’s realities.
In life coaching we talk about the River of Misery—I was ready to swim through that river (well maybe wade slowly since I am not that great of a swimmer).
Often, a life coaching session will center around looking at the new, as the client describes what they might want in the future.
Or, the client might feel stuck and unsure about what the future might hold, so they need prompts to move their thoughts forward.
It is a life coach's job to ask questions and guide the client’s mind and energy from the old to the new.
Are you ready to stop exhausting yourself by using all of your energy on what was rather than what can be? If you are ready to gather your energy and get to work on creating your future, click the link below or visit my website at www.nancybeardcoachingllc.comand book a free 45 minute appointment.
